Wow, the ER is Really Interesting at 1:30 a.m.

by Jill

Last night I ended up going to ER because of the excruciating pain in my arm. I signed in at 11:18 p.m. and didn’t get out until well after 3:30 a.m. It would have been even longer had I stayed and checked in at Jefferson’s ER (which is a total dump, despite having an excellent reputation as a first-rate medical facility). I figured I’d try Jeff first since my regular doctor practices out of there and I think she’s great. But anyway, since it’s a trauma hospital (and we are in Killadelphia!), the wait is super long in the ER. So it was off to Pennsylvania Hospital (they just opened the newly renovated ER yesterday) a few blocks away. In the rain. Fun.

(Sidenote: Everyone on staff was helpful and friendly, even at three in the morning! I was impressed. I’m seriously considering finding a new primary care physician in their network. And the hospital itself is now part of University of Pennsylvania Health Systems, so that’s a good sign.)

The doctor that checked me out said it’s most likely a bad muscle pull, though some of the pain could be from a pinched nerve in my neck where I’ve got a lot of muscle spasms. I figured as much and probably didn’t even need to go to the hospital but hell, I have insurance for a reason. Might as well get some use out of it, right? Plus, the Advil wasn’t really cutting it and the label warned me to not take more than six pills a day unless directed by a physician. Ha! I got the okay to take four pills every six hours, plus a Valium to help with the spasms. Wohoo! I’m a spaz! Maybe I’ll be able to sleep comfortably for the next few days. Finally. I should feel better in a few days. Maybe a week. But for now, I have a dumb sling to help limit the movement of my arm. Dork!

Oh, right. Did I mention how many drunk people there were in the ER last night? Jeez. College is definitely back in session because there were mad drunken fools all over the place, looking fairly busted up. Glazed-over eyes and popped collars, how attractive! I love me some eavesdropping so I was pretty content with my waiting room experience. I learned that some freshman girl puked all over a dude and then fell on her face or something but none of her friends would bring her to the hospital so the puke victim and his buddies did. Nice friends, girl. You might want to find some new ones. Then there was some drunken-looking hipster girl who had a bloodied hand (a bike accident, maybe?) and was being pretty annoying and whiny. Ugh, I wanted to buy her some new jean shorts and a bottle of shampoo. Oh right, and then there was the whole slew of (probably) underage sorority girls, dressed like Hooker Barbie, gathered in the corner waiting for one of their friends who got brought in on a stretcher for god-only-know what reason. Apparently, when I was in the back getting checked out, one of the girls passed out on the floor. Ha! Kids.

I swear, I’ve been pretty drunk before but never to point that I’ve needed to go to the ER. What is wrong with these kids?! Am I old? Do I just not understand anymore? Should I even give a shit? Ugh, people, learn how to handle your booze! I’m probably half your size and have never been in one of those so-called emergency situations. Wah!

I can’t think about it anymore. I’m going to go watch more Gossip Girl or read a few more chapters from Breaking Dawn, pop a Valium and take a freakin’ nap. I can’t be bothered with anything else today.

Thank goodness it’s raining.

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